09 June 2010

Dork & Me

- written supposedly by Robin 'Einstein' Varghese with the explicit permission of Sidin Vadukut.

May 5, 2010
2:43 PM

Feeling very sleepy, diary. Aswin is fighting with his broken mobile phone again. Setting an alarm for 6 PM. He wants to meet this Sidin Vadukut fellow at a book reading. I am going with him, yes. But purely from a technical standpoint. I want to know how these readings work. Can't people read on their own? Why do they need read-meets? What is the purpose? Of course, Gul Panag is in no way connected to my desire to go there. You know me, diary. I am a thorough professional.

2:54 PM

Aswin's slept. I am going to sleep as well. I am fairly sure he mentioned Gul in his sleep. I must be careful. Not that I am interested.

8:02 PM

Aswin just woke me up. He is mad at himself for missing the meet. His cellphone battery life is miserable. It got switched off before 6 and here we are, wasting our time at home. I had practiced some of the infamous Einstein moves for Gul (just in case she was interested). Bah.

As I have told you already, tomorrow, we leave for Bangalore.

May 6, 2010
5: 10 AM

Can you believe I am up at 5 in the morning, diary? Aswin woke me because he is scared of his stupid mobile again. I must remember to buy him a new one before he kills me. He is going to that B-School in Bangalore. Maybe all people from there are paranoid. I must not generalise, though. After all, the all important Einstein and the incredibly hopeless and insignificant Rahul Gupta (who did not get interviewed by CNBC's Sonali Mukherjee) are both from the same institution.

9:46 AM

He chose an aisle seat, I chose a window seat. What's there in a seat to 'choose'? They must give me a consulting project if they have any plans of improving the global aviation industry. By the way, we are going by this Jet Lite plane. Hope it doesn't crash.

10: 30 AM

Both of us sit next to beautiful girls. Of course I am still cross with myself for not meeting Gul yesterday, but surely all that practice with the Einstein moves shouldn't be wasted, diary? Especially that joke about this plane going to the Gulf because I am in it? He he. That always works.

11:20 AM

All hail the genius of Robin 'Einstein' Varghese. High-five, diary. So, this girl next to me is so sleepy that she falls on me once in 5 minutes. Aswin looks at me enviously as the girl next to him just leaned on the window and slept. Still better, no? Ha ha ha. Diary, if you had thought there were no complex calculations behind Einstein choosing the window seat, you are obviously mistaken. When he chose an aisle seat, my highly articulate mind calculated the probability of me sitting next to a girl.You know, Diary, that I got a B in Probability only because Prof. Ravi Shastri could not understand the complexities involved in my way of solving problems. Where were we? Yes, so when I found out that I had a good chance of sitting with a girl on a Sunday morning (she should probably be sleepy after a Saturday night party) and if she has to choose an aisle seat, she cannot sleep and fall on the pathway! She has to lean on the brilliant Einstein!

Ha ha ha. You should see Aswin's face now. It's turning green, ha ha ha.

11:30 AM

F&#%! The girl is now sleeping with her head on the tray table. Even the great Einstein didn't think of this eventuality! Aswin just ordered a cashew-nut pack to celebrate the failure of my plan. Hmmm, he asked me tips about doing well at Business schools yesterday. I will teach him to do all things that will get him into big trouble. Po da patti!

12:30 PM

Landed at Bangalore without any major mishap... Except that blasted tray table, of course. Surely, they should be banned, no, Diary?

This is just a blog post about me missing the Dork reading on my last day at Mumbai because of last minute packing and a blasted mobile phone. Of course, Sidin, even if this is bad Einstein-ism, this should probably get me a mention in the Second book. Preferably in the first page with a photograph. With a signed book delivered to me, yes. And of course, needless to say, a sponsored trip to Switzerland. 

More on the book, "Dork, The Incredible adventures of Robin 'Einstein' Varghese", here. Go buy it. 

This post is also to tell the eight (including sidin for this post) readers of this blog that I have reached Bangalore.


  1. G8... here it begins... enjoy maadi... its gonna be one hell of a time... hope you get to post more. and this was way too good a post.

  2. @karthik nanni. inga elarum enna romba silent aanavanu soltrukanga.

  3. Excellent! Beautifully done!